No Sympathy For The Devil

The Devil Wears Prada (4/5 stars)

First of all let me say straight out that you do not need to know anything about nor be interested in anything about fashion whatsoever to enjoy this movie. Infact it may even help if you don't and find the whole scene quite ridiculous like I do.

The movie, based on a novel by Lauren Weisberger, tells the story of a young woman named Andrea (Andy for short, played by Anne Hathaway) who has struggled to find a career in journalism in New York City and ends up applying for a job as the assistant of the fictional premiere fashion magazine in the world called Runway.

When walking in for the interview, we are first introduced to this world by the editor's other assistant Emily (played by Emily Blunt) whom is appalled that someone like Andy is applying for this job in the first place. She mocks her immediately; this is one part of the movie that is so great. The great absurdity of the characters in this movie is so pronounced when they viciously insult the beautiful Anne Hathaway for being fat of all things (apparently in their world anyone who wears anything more than a size 4 is, and while I don't know anything about sizes it must be someone who weighs about 80 pounds), and vilify her perfectly regular clothes. The narcissism and obsessiveness is written so well and acted out greatly by all the actors playing industry characters that you can probably appreciate it whether you are into that sort of thing (by knowing what they mean) or not (by seeing how absurd they are).

After this first encounter is where the movie gets really good though, as we meet the editor of Runway, Miranda (played by Meryl Streep). I can't say enough about how great she is in this movie (although she is great in just about everything she does). Her character is so deliciously mean, cold, selfish, and evil that I can't even believe that this is apparently based on a real person. However that gives the wrong impression, the real greatness of it is that she does not scream or yell but dishes everything out in such a calm and matter-of-fact manner. It says a lot about her talent when she can take such a drastic turn to this character from the down-to-earth simple radio show singer she portrayed in A Prairie Home Companion only about a month ago. Besides Meryl, the other people who particularly stand out are Emily Blunt and Stanley Tucci, who plays another employee at the magazine. Anne Hathaway is competant, but she exists really as a center of realism in a world of insanity, so it is the other characters in the movie who really stand out.

In any case, Andy's goal is to survive this job for one year, because this position is known to be a springboard for other opportunities in the publishing world. She lets herself be subjected to much torture and suffering from her new boss. Eventually, in an attempt to gain Miranda's approval, she begins to learn about the fashion world, dress better, and work ridiculously long hours, essentially becoming everything she hated from the start and alienating all of her friends. Even, to an extent, becoming similar to her boss. Eventually she gets over her temporary distraction and learns what is really important to her. Mentioning this doesn't ruin much, as it isn't hard to predict, the real strength of the movie isn't in knowing how it begins or guessing how it ends anyway, it is in the brutal satire in between.

I'd suggest you keep an open mind about this, I honestly did not think I would like this movie at all, I'm the farthest thing from the demographic that would be expected to, but it is great fun and finally a comedy this year that is actually on an adult level. Easily, easily, the best comedy of the year so far.

DVD: Find Me Bored

Find Me Guilty (2.5/5 stars)

Find Me Guilty tells the true story of an alleged mafia man Jackie DiNorsico who is first indicted on a RICO act charge (frequently used against organized crime) and offered a deal. After he refuses, he is later set up, arrested, and sent to jail on a thirty year prison sentence for drugs. He refuses to cooperate again, and being frustrated with his lawyer, decides to represent himself in what becomes one of the largest (dozens of defendants) and longest (over 600 days) trials in United States history.

Of course, not being a lawyer, his courtroom antics are a bit wacky, hence providing the comedic premise of the movie. However there is also some drama involved, his deteriorating relationship with the other lawyers and his co-defendants whom he refused to turn on, due to his antics at the trial. Also he has some family trouble, and eventually becomes worn down by the entire very long process.

I did not enjoy the movie very much because the comedy is not really that funny, and the drama is not that compelling either. It is enough to be mildly interesting though so it isn't absolutely horrible, only slightly below average. It is just disappointing because I expected a lot more from something by the great director Sidney Lumet (Network, Dog Day Afternoon, The Verdict, Serpico, among others). I wouldn't say don't see it, although I would probably wait for cable, just definitely don't set your expectations very high.

Child of a Lesser God

Superman Returns (4/5 stars)

The Superman franchise is back after several years with a whole new cast. Much like Batman Begins, this movie does much to bring revive a once great franchise from the absolute dreadfulness of the last few installments.

The story is that after a five year absence from Earth on a mission to find out what happened to his home planet of Krypton, Superman (Brandon Routh) returns to Earth to find it has changed a great deal while he was away. Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) now has a boyfriend (James Marsden) and a five year old child, and Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey) has gotten himself out of prison and is beginning to hatch a new plan for riches and destruction which is a twist on his scheme from the original movie with Christopher Reeve and Gene Hackman. At first it seems as if the world does not need him; Lois has even been awarded the pulitzer prize in his absence for an article entitled "Why the World Does Not Need Superman." Soon enough though, with Luthor's plan, and Lois's re-emerging feelings for him, he has his place back again in the world.

Bryan Singer (The Usual Suspects, X-Men parts one and two) directs and does well to do tribute to the original version but also add a lot of new flair. The action is exciting, the pace is quick despite the long running time, and unlike most comic book adaptations there is actually some character development. Perhaps more importantly, there is a just a great sense of wonder and awe at what you are watching throughout the entire movie.

The performances range between average (Routh) to good (Bosworth, surprisngly, Spacey, clearly having a lot fun in the best role I've seen him in for a long time, and Parker Posey whom I absolutely love in a supporting role as Luthor's tag-along). What is especially good here though is that the movie does not veer too far into camp, and the non-action sequences actually enhance the movie rather than detract from it, something that the Spider-Man franchise (which attempts, but in my opinion, sadly fails at) suffers from greatly. To top it off, the movie is absolutely stunning visually, with some of the best cinematography I've ever seen in a hero/comic movie.

Overall, this is probably one of (if not the) best action movies you are going to end up seeing this year, and is certainly much better than most comic book adaptations ever done. It does not quite measure up to Batman Begins, but in my opinion that is quite a difficult task. It makes up for the disappointment of X-Men: The Last Stand easily.

DVD: Imagine My Charming Almost Formula

Imagine Me And You (3.5/5 stars)

This film tells the story of a woman (Piper Perabo) who at her wedding to her long-time best friend (Matthew Goode, Match Point), has a "love at first sight" moment with the florist (Lena Headey) as she catches a glimpse of her while walking down the aisle.

What follows is fairly predictable and formulaic, even for a movie about a woman who falls in love with another woman at her wedding. She spends the entire movie deeply confused and becomes increasingly plagued with anxiety as she gets to know this new woman more, meanwhile her husband is at first oblivious but later catches on that something is not right in their relationship and wonders what is wrong, blaming it on himself. There's practically every cliche imaginable, from the accidental bump-into-each-other meetings all the way up to the frantic chase scene where one person much catch another person (while previously being on less than perfect terms) so that they can right their situation lest the other scorned person leaves forever, thus preventing them from never seeing each other again when the audience knows if only they come together before it is too late everything will turn out right.

This is the sort of movie that I normally loathe, but I actually found it pretty charming. The entire cast is just so very likeable it makes it hard to hate this even though you've seen it all before. The husband and his best friend are both very funny while both the women are quite adorable, and the actress who plays the florist in particular I hope shows up in more movies coming soon.

So if you're in the mood for some good brain candy and aren't expecting something profoundly moving, this is probably a good bet. Certainly much better than the other romantic comedies I've seen so far this year.

2005-2006 Television Awards

I thought I would weigh in on the best television of the 2005-2006 season. In the spirit of seeing how much I disagree with the major awards show of the medium, I'm sticking to shows that aired from June 2005 until May 2006. The only show that I watch regularly that did not air during this time period is Deadwood.

I don't like doing acting categories for television as it is, so I will just stick to the two major categories.

Best Drama Series
Big Love (HBO)
Grey's Anatomy (ABC)
House (FOX)
Huff (Showtime)
Six Feet Under (HBO)

Winner: Six Feet Under

It was probably my favorite show in the history of television, and the finale was bar none the best single episode of television ever aired. If this doesn't win at the Emmys, or even worse, does not get nominated, the people who vote for the awards should be sent to Taste School.

Best Comedy Series
Arrested Development (FOX)
Entourage (HBO)
The Office (NBC)
Scrubs (NBC)
Weeds (Showtime)

Winner: Scrubs

The most consistently hilarious show on TV. While I like all that I nominated, I think Scrubs had a particularly good season this year. Again, I will have much venom directed towards the Emmys if this does not get nominated. I already know that it doesn't have a shot in a million at winning though.

Sympathy for the Viewer

Lady Vengeance (2/5 stars)

While I am a big fan of one of Park Chan-wook's previous revenge-themed films, Oldboy, this film was an extremely disappointing experience, especially since I had been looking forward to seeing it for quite some time.

The story is about Lee Geum-Ja, who at the age of nineteen goes to prison for the murder of a small child, for which she was framed. In addition to this, the person who framed her is responsible for taking away from her something very dear to her heart. Thirteen years later she gets out, and we learn of the plan she has been hatching ever since her incarceration to exact revenge upon the person responsible for her ill fate. The plot cuts between the present and her experiences in prison, so we learn more about her past through the stories of her interacting with other inmates, some of whom she recruits to help her with her scheme. Eventually all secrets are revealed and we reach the climax of the movie where she finally gets to execute her revenge as well as retrieve some of what she has lost by being in prison all those years.

While some of the technical aspects of the film are excellent (it is shot extremely well and some scenes are breathtakingly beautiful), the direction and writing forage into the absolutely absurd so often that it completely destroys the movie. There were more moments than I can even count where I laughed at things that were unintentionally funny (or if they were intentionally funny, then it is a ridiculously bad type of humor), as well as several subplots that were vapid, phony, and completely unnecessary. Acting at some points is so completely horrifying that it will make you cringe. Finally, the climax drags on for so long that I was begging the movie to finally end.

What is really missing here is an interesting exploration of the morality of revenge. It is attempted a little in the final act, but it is ruined by the complete unplausibility of the situation, the dragging on, and the completely laughable execution. The movie suffers from a severe case of trying to be too vicious, as this is the source of much of the (potentially) unintentional comedy. Many people seem to be giving this movie a lot of praise, so the black humor aspect may just not be my thing. However, I enjoy black humor in movies quite often (a very good comparison to this particular movie that was done right are the Kill Bill movies) when it is done well and if it was intentional in this movie then it was just terrible in my opinion. So even though I hate this film, you make like it

Word Insanity

Wordplay (4/5 stars)

The ability of some of the the people in this movie to solve crossword puzzles drives me nuts. How can you possibly do a NYT crossword puzzle in less than 3 minutes? Am I that good at anything? Maybe Tetris. Otherwise, probably not.

In any case, this is a documentary about the New York Times crossword puzzle, its editor Will Shortz, and the annual tournament that surrounds bringst the fiercest competitors together. We learn the stories of several people who are obsessed and fascinated with creating and solving puzzles of any kind. Also shown are some famous puzzle addicts such as Jon Stewart, Bill Clinton, and others. What is interesting is how different most of these people are from each other, how their backgrounds and lifestyles differ. What unites them is their unique (and perhaps overboard) fascination with words and the ability to solve insanely hard puzzles in very short time spans.

The footage is deftly edited to create a sense of fascination with the puzzle solvers, a sense of tension about who will win the eventual tournament (the person who I was rooting for didn't, alas), and humor is used well throughout the film as a good change of pace. So while not deeply profound or moving, how could something with this subject matter be, really, it is still an enjoyable watch.

Abuse of Power

The Road to Guantanamo (4/5 stars)

This is the story of three British citizens who travel to Pakistan for a marriage and end up in a world of trouble. They decide while they are there to visit Afghanistan shortly after the 9/11 attacks and were present when the United States began its attack on that country. This is the story of how they are mistakenly identified as Taliban sympathizers, first by the Northern Alliance fighters, then by the United States military.

The story is told in three different ways: news footage, interviews of the principal subjects after the fact, and re-enactments of the events that the people involved experienced. The three facets are interwoven very well, we see news footage claiming the capture of terrorists spliced with the re-enactments and interviews of the subjects that show just how absolutely absurd it was that these unfortunate men were mistaken for terrorists in the first place. While they were in Pakistan for a legitimate reason, a marriage, no one would believe their story and they were relentlessly accused of collusion with the Taliban and Al-Qaeda, first in Afghanistan and then in the Guantanamo Prison in Cuba.

The fact that they shouldn't even need a legitimate reason for being where they are at all is an important aspect here, just because they were in Afghanistan at the wrong time and happened to be Muslims does that make them terrorists? There was no evidence against them whatsoever, and yet they were held for an extended length of time without charge, and even upon release the government never admitted that they had made any kind of mistake. The pain and humiliation depicted in the re-enactments is frightening, and while I already knew about this story, seeing it on screen makes me ashamed that I live in a country that is committing such atrocities against completely innocent people. Innocent until proven guilty only applies if you are on United States soil, apparently, as well as abuse standards, which is why the actual Guantanamo prison is probably not on United States soil in the first place.

This is a very compelling story of what can happen to people when power is abused, and it would be better if everyone knew what this country is doing. Can you imagine if someone broke a news story with something very similar happening to a US citizen on US soil? Havoc would break loose probably. Most people are turning a blind eye to this, as they are to most things the government is doing these days. It makes me wonder if there are just so many negative stories coming out that people are desensitized to it all, and no one really has the capability to be surprised or enraged anymore.

The movie does a good job of telling the story as best it can, I would rate it higher but I found some of the acting in the re-enactments to be fairly sub-par and unbelievable. Not because the people portraying the US military personnel were over the top, which I would believe, but that they just weren't very good actors. If they had done a better job with this aspect of the film then I would have liked it even more. In any case, awareness of this issue is important and the film should be seen.

2006 Movie Reviews

This is a post for all 2006 movie reviews. I will link to it from the sidebar and edit it as I have more reviews of 2006 movies.

2006 Movie Reviews (Updated 08/09/06)
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Akeelah and the Bee
The Ant Bully
Ask the Dust
The Break-Up
Brick
Bubble
Cars
Cavite
Clean
Clerks 2
The Da Vinci Code
The Descent
The Devil Loves Prada
District B-13
Don't Come Knocking
Duck Season
Fateless
Find Me Guilty
Freedomland
Friends With Money
A Good Woman
Hard Candy
The Heart of the Game
The Hidden Blade
Imagine Me And You
An Inconvenient Truth
Inside Man
Lady in the Water
Lady Vengeance
L'Enfant
Little Fish
Little Miss Sunshine
Miami Vice
Monster House
The Omen (2006)
On a Clear Day
One Last Thing...
Over the Hedge
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
A Prairie Home Companion
The Proposition
The Puffy Chair
The Road to Guantanamo
A Scanner Darkly
Scoop
The Sisters
Somersault
Something New
Strangers With Candy
Superman Returns
Take My Eyes
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
Thank You For Smoking
Time to Leave
Tristram Shandy: A Cock & Bull Story
Tsotsi
United 93
V for Vendetta
The War Tapes
Water
Who Killed the Electric Car?
Why We Fight
Winter Passing
Wordplay
World Trade Center
X-Men: The Last Stand

DVD: A Boring, Caustic Family

The Sisters (1.5/5 stars)

This is the story (despite the title) of four siblings (Mary Stuart Masterson, Maria Bello, Erika Christensen, and Alessandro Nivola) and their spouses and friends (Elizabeth Banks, Steven Culp, Tony Goldwyn, Eric McCormack, Chris O'Donnell, Rip Torn) who all live around or work at an unnamed university. You can easily tell that this story comes from a play, because the film is extremely dialogue heavy and almost entirely takes place in one room of a library at the college where many of the characters are professors.

The story opens with the friends and family planning a surprise party for the youngest sibling (Christensen), and moves from that to the drama of an accident that follows the party followed by a brief montage to let us know that some time has passed, finally concluding at another party at the same library for a baby shower for the wife of the brother (Nivola). Introduced are some preditable love trianges and deep-seeded issues between the family and friends to add much melodrama.

The plot does not serve much purpose but for a setting for the principal characters to showcase how they are very caustic and mean, and the story basically revolves around them acting unreasonably cruel to each other over the smallest contrivances. Along the way it is revealed that the more despicable a character is, the larger current or childhood trauma is that lies behind it and explains it.

This sort of thing sometimes works (Closer comes to mind), but here it does not. The acting is mostly horrendous (with the exception of Bello, and even then only at certain times), and the dialogue is filled with cliche ridden pseudo-intellectual babble of the sort that nobody in real life would ever say to each other. Thus, what could be the film's strength serves as the main weakness and the whole thing turns into a basically pointless exercise. This is something you can probably skip out on.

DVD: Not Such A 'Good' Movie

A Good Woman (2/5 stars)

This is the story of a young married couple in Italy (Scarlett Johannson, Mark Umbers) who may or may not be having an affair with a friend of the husband and an older woman (Roger Hammond, Helen Hunt), respesctively. Also thrown into the mix is another older man (Tom Wilkinson) who is interested in Helen Hunt's character as well. Finally, there are some very predictable secrets between some of the characters that are not revealed until the middle of the movie.

If you're not like me, and you don't think Helen Hunt is a wooden talentless hack, this might sound like an interesting premise with a good cast. But trust me, it is not. Despite the fact that the performances are good (except for Hunt), the characters are bland, the story is tedious, and the dialogue is plodding. I am not surprised that this got dumped into the early-year no man's land where bad movies get sent by studios to die.

Save yourself the trouble, and don't even bother renting it. I got it because I like Scarlett Johannson, but it isn't worth it at all.

Aside:

What is with all the movies coming out this year with 'Good' in the title? Besides this, there is A Good Year, The Good Sheppard, and The Good German all coming out later this year. Maybe the studios can start coming up with some better titles?

Altman's Eulogy to a Dying Art

A Prairie Home Companion (5/5 stars)

Like many Altman films, this is not an in-depth story about a select few characters but rather a slice of life of several different supporting characters. The backdrop for all of this is the fictional last show of the real-life variety radio show for which the movie is named after; the kind of show, as one character puts it, "died 50 years ago, but someone forgot to tell anybody."

Like a variety show, it has many different elements; lots of music, a little drama, comedy, musical comedy, satire, and sentimentality for the art form that is no longer around. However it is funny more than anything else, so going into it looking for a whole lot of laughter is probably the best approach. I think the easiest way to describe the movie is to imagine if you took one of Altman's previous movies, Nashville, and crossed it with a Christopher Guest mockumentary and a filmed tribute to any film, television show, or radio program which no longer exists.

This is not a plot driven film, but rather a character driven film, and Altman's deft splicing of the stories of the different characters and the superior acting all around make us really care for the people involved and even the show itself, even though this is a fictional story and most of the characters don't even actually exist in real life. It made me sad that it isn't possible for this kind of thing to be successful anymore, and I wish I would have been able to listen to it when it was. Death is a strong theme in the movie, not just of the show itself but even the mortality of some of the characters.

The cast of characters is quite large. There is an angel, played by Virginia Madsen (who seems eerily profound here in a very similar manner to her own previous performance in Sideways), who "takes people to see God." Another character is a hilarious private detective named Guy Noir (Kevin Kline), who narrates the film, and is a great caricature of someone from a bad detective story. There is also a pair of singing cowboys played by Woody Harrelson and John C. Reilly, who perform perhaps one of the funniest musical numbers I've ever seen in a movie called "Bad Jokes." The best characters, however, are a pair of singing sisters played by Meryl Streep (who can sing very well, incidentally) and Lily Tomlin, who are not only very funny but provide some of the most touching moments in the film. Lindsay Lohan plays Meryl Streep's daughter, and she is actually surprisingly capable and even has a few really impressive scenes. There is also Garrison Keillor, who plays himself and anchors the film, and has great moments throughout the movie. He doesn't want to treat this as his last show, he wants it to be just like any other show because "every show is your last show". He is not sentimental when everyone else around him is, despite the fact that this is his ending more than anyone else's. He also plays in perhaps my favorite scene, when the stage manager (played by Maya Rudolph from SNL) is having trouble with the script and he and several other players on the show are forced to improvise a long bit about duct tape of all ridiculous things. It's something that is so absurd it is very hard to describe with any kind of justice.

If you're looking for a lot of laughs, some good musical numbers, and a little sentiment for great things that are no longer here, this is a good bet for you. I personally really enjoyed it, rare is it that something can make me sad, touched, and then be practically crying from hysterical laughter several times all within the short span of under a couple hours.

Urban Congestion, Independent Film, and Comment Spamming

So it's Saturday. Yesterday I had a pretty good day, I saw two good movies (Cars, and A Prairie Home Companion), the latter of which I hope to post a review of tomorrow, and had some fun afterwards.

Today I thought I'd have a nice quiet day, maybe hang out in Golden Gate Park for awhile, or maybe catch up on some reading or stuff I have taped from Turner Classic movies.

However, this was not to be. I woke up to sounds of someone literally banging on my wall.

POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND!

This isn't exactly the most pleasant thing in the world to wake up to. I couldn't even tell where the noises were coming from. The apartment above me? Next to me? Nope! Construction was being done on the building next to mine, at 8:30 AM on a Saturday of all times, and if you know anything about San Francisco, you know that there isn't much space between the buildings so if there's construction going on next door you're probably going to hear it loud and clear.

So I get ready to go outside, and as is typical, it is a completely bleak and dreary day. Doing anything outside today seemed kind of pointless really, so I went back inside to see if I could actually deal with the pounding. I went back inside and started watching The Third Man which I had taped, volume practically full blast in order to drown out the noise.

POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND POUND!

It was so ridiculously loud that I couldn't even hear my own TV, playing very loudly, inside my apartment when construction was being done next door, so I decided I had to get out of there and go do something. Being that I didn't have any existing plans, and it was early afternoon on a Saturday and it seemed like scrounging up some was pretty unlikely, I thought maybe (being the movie junkie that I am) I'd go catch some movies I hadn't bothered to see yet.

The thing here is that I had already seen the two new movies that I wanted to see this weekend, and I had already seen everything else I wanted to see that came out on previous weekends. So what am I to do? Lower my standards, I suppose.

Now I had a few options. I could see a few different independent films (The King, Keeping Up With The Steins, Peaceful Warrior, Art School Confidential, or The Lost City) which I had previously dismissed due to having negative reviews below my threshold. Now I am pretty much an independent film fanatic, most of my favorite films are small films, and they comprise probably 80% of the films I see. You've probably noticed this already from the review content on this site when you may have never even heard of a movie I'm talking about before. However I have this opinion: while I usually enjoy a really good independent movie more than a really good studio one, I usually hate a really bad independent film more than a bad studio film. If I'm going to take a risk on an independent movie with questionable RT and Metacritic scores, I usually wait until Netflix to do so. At least if I see a bad studio movie there's a good chance I'll be able to talk about it with someone I know later on and maybe get a laugh out of it. That's not the case if nobody else has even seen it.

So what do I do? I went and saw The Break-Up and The Omen, both of which were pretty much awful. Not a very enjoyable day for me I must say. Those are the breaks I suppose, I guess since this new construction will be going on for awhile I am guessing I will have to arrange my schedule to never be home Saturday morning and afternoon.

After I got home, I checked this page to check for the occasional rare comment that I get (note to readers: comment more, I tend to get more email, but comments are kind of more fun and interactive), and noticed that almost every page on the site had a new comment with a random message such as "Love your site!" What all of these posts had in common was that they had a link to a webpage with links to a bunch of gambling sites and the like, so I deleted all of them. It is a shame, I like to allow anonymous commenting on my page, but if this happens again I'm going to probably have to turn it off. I don't really feel like digging through my posts and deleting annoying spam. I have to do enough of that in email with the stuff that my filters don't catch.

Is this a new phenomenon, blog comment spamming? I haven't read about it yet but it has obviously happened to other people before.

Anyway, that's all for today.

A Completely Unnecessary Remake

The Omen (2006) (1.5/5 stars)

If you're easily drawn into cheap tricks and ridiculous contrivances in horror movies, this might be something you'd be into. I however did not enjoy this movie at all. While I wasn't expecting any kind of masterpiece, and having already seen the original Omen, which isn't even in the realm of my favorite religious themed horror movies (The Exorcist, and Rosemary's Baby are far superior), I thought it might at least be slightly entertaining.

The whole thing is just very silly, and the attempt to tie it to current events going on in the world even makes it even more preposterous. It's basically a bland thriller with the occasional MTV style cut-shot of something scary-looking, or a random supposedly scary dream sequence, to throw you off balance for a second, after which the regular (and oh so very compelling) story continues.

None of the actors are particularly bland, and some of the actual technical work in the movie is pretty good, but it doesn't make up for the lack of quality overall. If you're thinking about seeing this you should probably just see the original instead, or better yet, watch the other movies I mentioned above, which are way better.

The truly saddest thing about this is that Mia Farrow, whom I like and have missed, makes a comback appearance. It's sad because she picked such a completely awful movie to do it in. Hopefully she can get some better work if she so desires in the future.

A Bad Romantic Comedy

The Break-Up (1.5/5 stars)

You know, despite the bad reviews, I went into this with an open mind considering the positive reception I've heard from people I know who have seen it. I have to say though, that I simply didn't enjoy it at all.

I found the comedy very flat, and didn't really care for the more serious parts because frankly I just didn't like almost all of the characters. Not to mention that the whole premise of the movie, the relationship's sudden and drastic implosion, is quite implausible; equally implausible is the complete 180 degree personality change that Vince Vaughn's character takes towards the end.

As for the supporting characters, I liked the character that Vincent D'Onofrio played, while I absolutely loathed Aniston's brother. I wanted to smack him. Annoying and not the slightest bit funny.

What surprised me, considering that I don't like her at all, is that Jennifer Aniston isn't even close to what bothered me the most about the movie. Vaughn bugged me a lot more, and more importantly I thought the biggest problems were in the writing. I guess I like my comedies a bit more witty I suppose.

Skip it.

The Latest From Pixar

Cars (4/5 stars)

This was a nice little movie. Entertaining and funny thoughout, and some heart and real wit too, which seems to be lacking from most of the purely slapstick based animated comedies that are coming out these days.

The story is simple. A car named Lightning McQueen (voiced by Owen Wilson) is competing in what must be the be-all-end-all car race in the movie's universe, the Piston Cup. He is a rookie and attempting to be the first one to ever win. He is arrogant, selfish, and doesn't think he needs any help from anyone. During the race his foolishness leads him to blow a sure win, and this eventually leads to a three-way tie between him, the kind-hearted reigning champion, and the mean-spirited perennial runner-up. A tie-breaker race is scheduled in a week's time far away in California. The movie really begins here, as Lightning needs to travel to California for the race. On the way he gets waylayed, and ends up in a run-down deserted town called Radiator Springs on Route 66 where he meets a cast of wacky, interesting, and endearing characters. For reasons I won't explain here he must stay in the town for awhile before continuing on to the race. It is here that he learns a little about what is really important and becomes better for it.

While I enjoyed the movie as I said, what I wonder is whether this is really more of a movie for adults than kids. The fact that the protagonists are all, well, cars, doesn't exactly lend itself to the slapstick and other goofy visual humor that I think kids enjoy more out of this sort of thing. Most of the best stuff was in the jokes the little ones wouldn't even get, I think. There is, however, a nice little short that plays before the movie that is exactly what kids would like. I only wish that this sort of thing was done with more movies. It is certainly a lot more interesting than watching 10 minutes of commercials.

This is definitely better than Over the Hedge was, and if you're into animated movies at all, I fully recommend it.

Why Make This Movie, Why?

Nacho Libre

I'm predicting this movie to contend heavily at the Razzies. I'm not going to see it so it won't be replacing my current worst movie of the year, Freedomland, but there is just no way this is going to be good. Who thinks up this stuff, seriously?

Although, stuff like Basic Instinct 2 and several others this year are going to be pretty hard to top.

The End of the World as We Know It

An Inconvenient Truth (5/5 stars)

I'm not even going to bother going into the specifics of what's in the movie here too much. Just go see it. Make other people see it too. Especially those who are opposed or are moderates on the issue. Even if you already think you're going to agree wholeheartedly with the movie's message there's probably a few things in here that will still shock you an make your viewpoint even clearer.

This, despite what you might think, is not a preaching to the choir film. Although I am a little afraid that only the choir will go see it. The opposing viewpoint is criticized and debunked fairly, even though it doesn't necessarily see it. I think the only people who would not like this movie are those that are so insanely blinded by their politically conservative nature that they will immediately dismiss anything that's seen as a liberal issue. Or maybe some of the same people who still think that evolution is up for debate. Or maybe even people who think the world is flat. It is pretty amazing how successful the campaign of uncertainty and doubt against the scientifc findings has actually been. I will mention one fact from the movie. The number out of 982 peer-reviewed studies that contract the fact that global warming exists and is caused by human beings? Zero. The percentage of mainstream press articles which cast doubt on these scientific findings? Fifty-three percent.

To those who would say that the film is one sided: there are simply not two equally opposing and rational viewpoints to every issue. To those who say the movie is a scare tactic: what do you expect, when the subject is the possible annihilation of the planet? I wish people would understand that this should not be a political issue at all, but it is (as is said in the movie) a moral one. We're killing the planet. That is wrong in itself, but any concern about doing something about it is totally secondary. Even if you think that there are economic concerns that need to be balanced with environmental concerns? What if *is* no planet where the economy can even exist?

I only wish that Al Gore had brought out the personality that he has in this movie and made this THE issue in 2000. He's actually *funny*, personable, and the subject matter is pretty hard to ignore. I think he would've won in a landslide.

Is This Actually Serious?

An A-Team movie? Who can possibly replace Mr. T?

I'm trying to think of a television to movie translation that was actually good. The only thing I can come up with off the top of my head (that's not a cartoon, anyway) is The Fugitive, is there something I'm missing? Why do people make these movies? More importantly, why do people go see them?

Why Does Jennifer Aniston Have A Career?

Does anybody actually think she is talented, at all? Her movie (The Break-Up), with a bad 32% Rotten Tomatoes score, and an absolutely abysmal 18% cream of the crop score, is going to be the number one movie for the weekend. I suppose they must? I don't think she's ever been in anything good. EVER. And her movie might open up with as much as *forty million dollars*. Sigh.

In other news... I guess I called it right on being disappointed by X Men 3. It is going to have one of the most ridiculous first-to-second weekend dropoffs in box office history, losing perhaps as much as 70% of the first weekend's gross. That's just insane. No repeat business there.

A Nice Little Quirky Comedy

The Puffy Chair (4/5 stars)

The Puffy Chair is the first feature by the writer/director team of Jay and Mark Duplass, and it kind of shows. It is the sort of movie you might imagine yourself making with no budget, but all of the sincerity and attention to quality of character that you would want in your first creaton.

The premise is a little quirky like the movie itself. It is about a twenty-something male who purchases a big red puffy chair on Ebay as a birthday present for his father, and the road trip he goes on from New York City to Atlanta to pick up the chair and deliver it to his former home. He brings along his girlfriend, and on the way stops to visit his brother (who steals every scene he is in) who ends up tagging along for the ride.

It seems simplistic, and well, it is really, but the strength is really in the characters themselves and not in the plot. The boyfriend and girlfriend act so cutely ridiculous to each other, but they also are at the stage in their lives where they question who they are and what the point of everything is and where they are going. A little drama and tension inevitably develops between them along the way because he is a little bit of a screw-up and doesn't know or care what he wants, where she does and can't get it. The brother, who is a kind of burnt out hippie type, is absolutely hilarious. He thinks a chair can bring bad vibes to a road trip, he has a fake marriage with a girl he meets in a movie theater and decides it didn't work out all in the same day, amongst other funny things. I have known a few people like this guy in my life so maybe I find it more endearing.

The low budget makes the film feel sort of like a documentary almost, and everyone seems very genuine and real. I guess the credit probably goes to the acting, the quirky writing, and the nice intimacy of the directing but it works out on all accounts. I'd like to see what the creators make in the future, I imagine it would only be better.

Action Hyperactive

District B-13 (3.5/5 stars)

If you're in the mood for a pure, adrenaline filled action movie this is probably a good bet for you. It is quite intense, fast-paced, full of sequences bordering on the completely ridiculous, but nevertheless quite fun.

The plot, while not that imporant really, is this: it is the year 2010, crime has gotten so bad in one area of Paris that they literally wall in a portion of the city. Crime flourishes. Some good people, however, remain in the area. One of those people ends up teaming up with a police officer to disarm a stolen nuclear bomb set to go off in 24 hours.

The movie seems like a regular action movie on Ritalin. It does not really bother to pause for the bad character development and contrivances that you might expect. It just tries to blow you away. The stunts the two main characters perform are so rapid and insane that the audience literally laughed (not like it was bad, like "oh WOW" I suppose) because of the insanity of it all. I seriously am amazed at how they even managed to pull off some of the tricks; in one towards the beginning of the movie a guy literally flies at top speed through a narrow window above a door and it doesn't seem even remotely possible that any human being could do it.

The one thing that prevents it from being better is that it just doesn't have ANY substance, it is pure candy, kind of like watching a 90 minute long music video with a lot of fighting and chase sequences instead of musicians. Not bad though if you go for that sort of thing.